partybarackisinthehousetonight:

i am proud to live in a world where pizza gets to your house before the police will

voculabulary:

wake-up-kid:

runwhenisayrunfightwhenisayfight:

ahorsecalledhonour:

fixthefisherking:

banjaxed:

nightlifemingus:

nosdrinker:

hypnotiqradiance:

If you don’t get this reference, you’re too young for tumblr.

are you fucking kidding me pixar puts out a movie ever year a baby would get this reference

it’s not pixar it’s a reference to that time in 1994 when lamps became sentient humanoids

many were lost that day

It was a grim day for mankind. My parents took refuge in a cave and thus saved us from certain death; we lived close to a lamp factory at the time and the surrounding region was utterly devastated in the conflict.

My brother fought one off using only an egg whisk and a pogo stick.

Only 90s kids remember the Lampocalypse

My father still has the scars from where one stole his kidney

Ironically, it was a dark time.

You did not

bounoromato:

cokeflow:

I CAN SHOW U THE WORLD

HAVE YOU SEEN MY SON?

genocidercyo:

clockey:

you’re the window to my wall

you’re the sweat that drips down my balls

sadmale:

do you ever feel physically sick because you know you’re not good enough for anybody and you can’t do anything right and you’re too tired to go on

The hardest question in my life right now is do I sleep shirted or topless?
It’s quite warm I can’t decide

coagulates:

someone fall in love with me i am bored

treebeard-the-anarchist:

andallthatjazzandstuff:

whoa, this almost made me cry. My thoughts exactly…if you wanna be average - do all these things.

never.

happysmileyginger:

auspisstice:

cyberdepressed:

HAVE U EVER NOTICED THAT VAGINAS AND SCHOOL BOTH HAVE 6 LETTERS AND ARE EMPTY HOLES OF NOTHING THAT CAN HOLD SCREAMING CHILDREN FOR 9 MONTHS

i

…….